Tue11252014

News

LA council votes to delay community center update

LA council votes to delay community center update


Ellie Van Houtte/ Town Crier
The Los Altos City Council voted to delay adoption of a community center conceptual design plan last week. The plan includes elements from a design charette held earlier this fall, left.

The Los Altos City Council last...

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Schools

Scientists bring experiments into MV classrooms

Scientists bring experiments into MV classrooms


Ellie Van Houtte/Town Crier
During a Science is Learning geology lesson, Theuerkauf Elementary School students learn about igneous rocks by observing how sugar changes form when heated.

Hundreds of local elementary students perform experiments w...

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Community

Local actors star in PYT's 'Oklahoma!'

Local actors star in PYT's 'Oklahoma!'


Courtesy of Peninsula Youth Theatre
PYT’s “Oklahoma!” features, from left, David Peters of Mountain View, Jenna Levere of Los Altos and Kai Wessel of Mountain View.

Time is running out to catch Peninsula Youth Theatre’s production of “Oklahoma!”...

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Sports

Eagles advance

Eagles advance


Ellie Van Houtte/Town Crier
Los Altos High’s Carmen Annevelink, left, and Kristen Liu put up a block against Mountain View. Annevelink totaled 20 kills.

Mountain View High’s out-of-the-gate energy could last for only so long against rival and he...

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Comment

Coping with addictions: Haugh About That?

Preparing to deal with my lifelong addiction, I stood in front of the mirror ready to confess the shame I’d been hiding. The first step to healing, I reminded myself, is to admit something is wrong.

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Special Sections

NASA, Google agreement preserves Hangar One

NASA, Google agreement preserves Hangar One


Bruce Barton/Town Crier
Hangar One, pictured here last January, will be restored under an agreement between Google and NASA.

NASA and Google Inc. forged an agreement last week that allows Google to lease a portion of NASA’s historic Moffett Fede...

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Business

State Street science center closing Nov. 30

State Street science center closing Nov. 30


Ellie Van Houtte/
Helix at 316 State St. is closing after the completion of a one-year grant from Passerelle Investment Co. The science center became a popular destination because of its various exhibits. Town Crier

A popular downtown destination...

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Books

Children's author signs books at Linden Tree

Children's author signs books at Linden Tree


Author Tiffany Papageorge is scheduled to sign copies of new her book 11 a.m. Dec. 6 at Linden Tree Books, 265 State St., Los Altos.

Papageorge’s “My Yellow Balloon” (Minoan Moon, 2014) is a Mom’s Choice “Gold” winner. In the book, the Los Gat...

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People

JAMES WINDELL SMITH

JAMES WINDELL SMITH

January 11, 1939 – November 6, 2014
Resident of Mountain View

James Windell Smith, a 40 year resident of Los Altos, passed away from complications after a post-surgery stroke November 6th, 2014 in Los Gatos, California.

Born on January 11, 1939 on...

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Travel

Olive Sonoma: There's more to the quaint town than wine

Olive Sonoma: There's more to the quaint town than wine


Eren Göknar/ Special to the Town Crier
While many day-trippers may think that Sonoma is all about the grapes, the region boasts other delights. Try a biplane ride over the patchwork landscape.

Sonoma, a scenic two-hour drive from Los Altos, boa...

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Stepping Out

LA Stage Company opens 'Fairway'

The Los Altos Stage Company production of Ken Ludwig’s new comedy “The Fox on the Fairway” is slated to run Thursday through Dec. 14 at Bus Barn Theater, 97 Hillview Ave.

A tribute to the English farces of the 1930s and 1940s, “Fox” is a romp that p...

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Spiritual Life

Author of Jewish historical novel slated at Congregation Beth Am

Author of Jewish historical novel slated at Congregation Beth Am


The Beth Am Women have scheduled “A Conversation with Author Maggie Anton” 7:30 p.m. Nov. 20 at Congregation Beth Am, 26790 Arastradero Road, Los Altos Hills.

Anton, winner of the 2012 National Jewish Book Award for Fiction, will discu...

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Magazine

Christmas At Our House home tour celebrates 26 years

Christmas At Our House home tour celebrates 26 years


Courtesy of Christopher Stark
Homes on the St. Francis High School Women’s Club’s Christmas at Our House Holiday Home Tour showcase a variety of architectural styles.

The days grow short on sunshine but long on nostalgia as the holidays approach...

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Second time around

Photo Courtesy Of Eren Gknar/Special To The Town Crier Eren Gknar and her boyfriend, Peter Robertson, enjoy a beach vacation in Florida last year.

 

For a brief time last year, I found myself in the bridal industry niche for women planning their second weddings, a group Miss Manners calls “older” brides. It’s unclear when one falls into that “older” bride group, but on its last cover, the now-defunct Bride Again magazine featured a woman who couldn’t have been more than 35.

I’ve been around longer than that, but until I headed for the altar, I just thought I was “wiser.”

Because the divorce rate is now approximately 50 percent, according to the National Center for Health Statistics, one would think that encore brides would have a real presence. However, most of them must be getting married quietly or in a chapel in Reno.

When I first tied the knot many moons ago, getting married was highly unfashionable. We did it anyway, in a large outdoor party at someone’s house where guests danced the night away to music from a friend’s rock ’n’ roll band. My mother was not amused. She had probably hoped that I would “act my age.”

Times have changed since the 1970s, so I decided to consult Miss Manners, aka Judith Martin, and other bridal experts. Most brides think the second wedding is the only one that counts, according to Martin, so they often decide to do it right, with an “event.”

From Miss Manners, I learned that the older bride wears a suit and hat and holds an appropriately subdued afternoon ceremony with punch and cake.

Like many baby boomers, however, I was not used to acting my age to that extent. I was used to celebrating milestones in a big way. Well, as big as limited finances would allow, considering we were nearing retirement age with the ensuing prospect of fixed incomes.

Several obstacles soon presented themselves. There was the color of my gown – and yes, I was determined to wear one, not a frothy, frilly number, but something that alluded to my experience, in a veiled way.

After my future mother-in-law congratulated me on landing the grand prize – her smart and talented son – she surprised me by saying, “Of course, you can’t wear white.” There aren’t too many black bridal gowns on the market, and actually, I had rather envisioned myself in white.

This idea that you cannot wear white is apparently commonplace but nonetheless misguided. Martin explains on page 409 of her “Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior” (W.W. Norton & Company, 2005) that the white-equals-innocence concept started with Queen Victoria.

However, Martin takes offense, stating pithily that the idea that white packaging advertises untouched goods always strikes her as “vulgar as it is unlikely.” Wish I had thought of that.

Because the bride makes a grand entrance, I did need to consider how to package myself. I called Priscilla of Boston on Santana Row and asked Summer about dresses for older brides.

There’s no separate section, but the store stocks dresses that are “a little more conservative, that cover up more, if that’s what you mean.” She noted that these encore bride dresses were “plainer, for second weddings.”

It’s true that encore brides have different couture needs. I spend time at the gym, but not that much time, so camouflage ranks high on my list of sartorial requirements. Baring my arms, shoulders or even my neck for professional photographs makes me blanch, not blush. So I thought we could drop by Priscilla’s to look at the dresses.

Next, we had to book a venue to nail down a date. We decided on marrying in a winery, a suitably Northern California idea that would underscore our sophistication, or so we thought.

I booked several appointments with winery social directors to get the grand tour. This is when I began to feel, well, foolish, not unlike the older man who chases after women half his age.

The appointments before and after mine seemed to be taken by gaggles of giggling teenagers, though they couldn’t have been that young. They had to have reached the age of majority.

A quizzical look would appear in the über-polished wedding event director’s eyes.

“Is this for you?” he or she would say in a tactful tone.

If you look at the magazines lined up at the local Borders bookstore, you will see dozens of bridal magazines, most featuring young blond women in strapless sweetheart gowns. None of them appears to have weathered a few years.

I asked the public relations director at a recent Santa Clara bridal fair if there were any magazines or booths for the mature bride, and she said, no, though there was one for grooms.

They just have to wear tuxedos, so why do they need their own magazines?

Eren Göknar is a freelance writer. E-mail her at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .

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