By Judith S. Duque, LMFT

Q. What can you tell me about IMing and MySpace?

A. IMing, also known as instant messaging, is replacing teen e-mail because it’s more efficient due to its speed. E-mail to the teen is what a letter and stamp are to the adult world: snail mail! The process of e-mailing - typing, sending and waiting for a reply - is now considered way too time-consuming by many teens. Text and instant messages are just that - instant. Out of necessity, IM has created a clever vocabulary and conversational style. A conversation might go something like this:

Hey.

Hey.

Watsup?

Nothin’. U?

Nothin’.

G2G (got to go), NP (nosy parent).

TTYL (talk to you later) or BRB (be right back).

NVM (never mind).

L8 (late or later).

99 (nighty-night).

MySpace.com is a site that I encourage ALL parents to check out. If you are not shocked at some of the explicit nature of the material, please e-mail me and tell me why not. This site serves the same purpose as IM, allowing users a place to carry on conversations. BUT - and there is a big BUT here - MySpace has users who pose as friends, but who are in reality predators with the teen as their quarry.

KEY: To sign up to use MySpace, your teen has to have an e-mail address.

KEY: Computers used by children and teens should be located in open, well-trafficked areas in the home.

Q. Should I be worried as I listen to my children speaking the new teen speak of instant messaging? I said something funny to my daughter last night and she responded with “LOL.” After she educated me to its meaning, “laugh out loud,” I couldn’t help but laugh at the cleverness and at the same time feel sad - “LOL” - an abbreviation instead of a great belly laugh!

A. Just in time to balance the teen speak is a recently published paperback “English for Execs” (Xlibris Corp., 2006) by Connie LeBaron. It is a humorous, albeit very serious, book with 10 short, easy lessons aimed at “everyone who desires to use good English and speak English well!” As the author says in her author’s note, “I wish you good humor and perfect English!”

KEY: As your daughter teaches you how to communicate using her teen humor, perhaps you can teach her with LeBaron’s “humor and perfect English.”

Summer wishes: Walking barefoot in the grass, picnicking in the park (or your backyard), spontaneous runs for ice cream cones and watching the grass grow.