By Clyde Noel

A Side of Clyde

Thanksgiving is a family event. It’s also a time when children learn to be thankful. When you sit down for the Thanksgiving Day dinner, it’s nice to ask the young adults if they would be kind enough to give the blessing before the family starts to eat. Several years ago, at our Thanksgiving dinner, my grandson bellowed as we sat down, “May I please say the blessing?”

“God is good! God is neat!

“Let’s all thank him for what we eat!

“Yea, God!”

My grandson has a megaphone voice. Not only did God get the message, but so did everybody in the kitchen, including my neighbor’s kitchen.

It’s a big deal for children to say the blessing before the family dinner.

It’s not easy either. One of the first Thanksgiving dinners I can remember, my grandfather asked me to say the blessing.

Grandfather: “Say the blessing, son.”

Grandmother: “And don’t mumble.”

Me: “ThankyouGodforthemashedpotat … “

Grandmother: “You’re mumbling.”

Me: ” … oesthesweetpotatoesandtheturkeyandthepumpkin.”

Grandfather: “Amen. That was good, but you don’t have to thank God for everything on the table.”

Me: “I wasn’t going to mention the turkey dressing.”

After mastering a nice little blessing that everyone at the table agrees is cute, then the young adult can move on to a more clever state of blessing.

Sitting at my boyhood friend Sneezy Snyder’s house one Sunday dinner, I remember my friend’s mother asking, “Sneezy would you please say grace?” as she bowed her head.

“Grace,” he replied, howling at his genius.

“Whack-O” was the sound of his father’s hand as it hit the back of my friend’s head.

There was another blessing he recited one day that sent him to his room:

“Good bread. Good meat.

“Good Lord. Let’s eat!”

One of my cousins was a picky eater. When he was asked to provide grace for the more than 20 people at Thanksgiving dinner, this was his blessing:

“Bless the Lord for the turkey meat.

Bless the Lord for the pie I’m gonna eat.

Bless the Lord for butter and the muffin,

But please, Lord, I ain’t eatin’ turkey stuffin’.”

When it comes to smart-aleck blessings, Sneezy took the prize. His all time classic was the following:

“Bless you, Lord, for this meal and my brother in the Navy.

But thank you, Lord, cause I ain’t eatin’ any turkey gravy.”

My grandchildren live 3,000 miles from Los Altos, but I’m sure one of them will be in the “clever blessing stage.”

I’m sure they now eat turkey dressing smothered in turkey gravy like the rest of us.

Clyde Noel is a longtime contributor to the Town Crier.