By Joan Passarelli

Transitions

If you’ve lost your job recently, and if the circumstances were particularly painful, you may be feeling more than just stress. You may actually be suffering from trauma.

Rev. Dr. Jim Thomas, a psychologist and priest, summarized the American Psychiatric Association’s list of trauma symptoms as follows:

Do you have intrusive, distressing thoughts about the event? Are you dreaming about it? Does it still feel like it just happened?

Do you try to avoid reminders of your job loss, for example, driving a different route so as to avoid your old work site? Do you feel detached and passionless? Do you have trouble showing love to the people you live with?

Do you have difficulty falling asleep? Are you often irritable or angry? Do you have difficulty concentrating on what you’re doing? Are you “hyper-vigilant,” afraid and looking for things that might hurt you?

If you are feeling many of these symptoms, you may be traumatized. Just knowing the symptoms and recognizing them in yourself is a start toward greater calm. You can also take these steps to help:

Talk about it. Express your feelings and get support.

If you have trouble showing or feeling love, tell your partner and your family about it.

For trouble falling asleep, cut out caffeine, take an evening walk, or have a hot bath before bed.

Seek a professional’s advice if you need it.

Watch out for the temptation of self-medicating with alcohol, food or spending. It’ll only make things worse.

Don’t count on the approaching holidays to make you feel better. Always stressful, this year they’re likely to be worse.

Be kind and patient with yourself. Give yourself extra time to get things done.

Accept your temporary limitations, take care of yourself, and start to feel better.

This is part of a series based on the work of Rev. Dr. Jim Thomas, who is leading the group Transitions for those in big life transitions, especially changing jobs. Transitions meets Thursday evenings, 6-8 p.m., at St. Timothy’s Episcopal Church, 2094 Grant Road, Mountain View, free of charge.